Zee TV Fraud!
For Immediate release: Zee TV refuses to apologize
(ACPA-Dallas) Indian satellite broadcaster, Zee-TV USA, confirmed today that it wont apologize to viewers over its never-ending stream of fraudulent commercials for UK based psychic healers. Angry officials at the satellite channel made the statement on the heels of an investigation by researchers from Satire & Comment.
Researchers looked into Pandit Maharaj, Ajmeri Baba and Peer Syed, 3 spiritual healers whose commercials air continuously on the DISH-Network, satellite TV channel. They uncovered data which showed that the psychic claims being made on Zee TV were simply not true.
Persistent Black Magic
The research team posed multiple problems to the alleged healers to test their claims and the results were startling. "We first looked at Pandit Maharaj," said Satire & Comment Editor, Ronald Pecorry. "He claims in his commercial to be able to get rid of black magic within 7 days, however we found that it regularly took eight, nine and sometimes even ten days to completely remove black magic. He is definitely not reliable."
Researchers saw some successes, noting that Ajmeri Baba was indeed able to get rid of black magic within an astonishing "24 hours" as advertised. "Yes, 24 hours later I was free of black magic," said researcher Hari Mirch, but I was still deserted by my loved ones, even though his Zee-TV commercials promise to fix that." Another researcher agreed and noted: "I gave hundreds of dollars in fees to the healer and despite his guarantee of success, my children are still disobedient, he is supposed to be able fix that for me."
Peer Syed's claim to remove black magic in 48 hours was fairly reliable, but travel researchers found that the healer failed to "solve immigration problems" after expensive guarantees. "Five thousand dollars later, I still had no green card," said researcher Sanjay Subji. Overall, despite the claims of the healers to solve money problems, researchers noted that they were all worse off financially due to the exorbitant fees extorted from them for the psychic services.
Zee-TV officials denied that they are facilitating fraud against their loyal viewers by promoting the long distance charlatans. A spokesperson explained, "the psychic phones numbers we advertise are located in England, so technically the crimes are being committed in England, where the fake psychics are located, so we have no responsibility. We are making lots of money out of it too, so what's wrong with that? Hey its a free country here you know!"