Sweden's New Anti-Terrorism Eavesdropping Law
For immediate release: Code of Silence
(ACPA-Stockholm) Sweden's new Right Wing Parliament has narrowly passed a law that gives the government sweeping powers to force citizens to talk to each other.
The "Safer Sweden Communications Act" establishes minimum annual
conversation quotas and mandates Swedes to talk to each other at least
once every day and twice a day in Winter. The new rules allow the
government to eavesdrop in homes and offices to ensure
compliance.
The new legislation closely mirrors the post 9-11 efforts of the Bush administration to monitor communications with the "Protect America Act" . That Law was primarily driven by concerns that free speech rules in America were allowing terrorists to easily communicate with each other.
Swedish authorities however are more concerned that terrorists are hiding their devious plots behind the treasured Scandic right of not speaking to anyone for days on end. It's hoped that with the new rules terrorists will inadvertently reveal their devious plans during the daily forced conversations.
Forced exile to Gothenburg (applies only to Stockholm residents) and torture techniques such as svenska-boarding, the medieval practice of being forced to drink Swedish beer, are also included in the legislation.
A similar law was proposed in Finland but quietly failed. The Parliamentary debate on the subject fizzled out after 5 minutes when the MP who sponsored the proposal finished her opening remarks. Members then sat quietly for two hours before politely excusing themselves for a schnapps.
Also read about Atheist Sees Image of Big Bang in Slice of Toast
Denmark in Cartoon Riot Crisis
Belgiums in Shock Over Budweiser Takeover
China Prepares for Low Quality Olympic Tourists
Click here for all our Satire News Stories
Thanks for visiting!
