Bombing Africans, not Arabs: is this the change we should believe in?
(ACPA-Benghazi) Obama promised change we can believe in and he has finally delivered! No more of that run of the mill bombing the Middle East for this administration, it's Africa's turn! Africa has been overlooked for far too long. Sure, Bush Sr. had his little blackhawk-down Somalia thing in 1990, but that was more of a "Bomb-aid, feeling sorry for the starving" event rather than a genuine attempt at war.
"What about Clinton?" you might ask. Yes, he bombed Sudan, but just two missiles! Heck, he launched more missiles on Monica. Frankly, until Obama stepped up to the plate, we had never been treated to the excitement of cruise missiles flying south, not east, this time towards the Dark Continent.
"America has never really put it's heart into military operations against the Dark Continent," said commentator Thomas Friedman. "Historians argue that Africa got off easy because of our guilt over slavery, and they may be right, but now change is here. I'm proud of my President."
Speaking candidly to the Press Corps, President Obama stated, "Look, every US President attacks other countries, that's just a perk of the job, like flying in Air Force One. The Bushes had Iraq, Clinton had Serbia. Attacking Africa is going to be my legacy."
It's not a "War on Libya" till we've spent $100B
But despite the fighting words, Democrats are still playing defense against Republican claims of indecision and a lack of clear military strategy. "Sure, he dropped a few bombs," said serial adulterer and presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich, "but he won't get to call it his 'War on Libya' until he spends at least a hundred billion dollars."
"That true, so far it's just an 'operation' at best." said war historian, Mark Matthews of Ohio State University. "Reagan spent millions against Grenada in 1983 but that foray was too small to ever make it past 'invasion' status. Panama in 1989 was more of a two week jaunt, not really a war. Obama's $550m spend on Libya is a good start and I'm sure he'll get over the billion dollar mark, but I don't think he is going to get war status out of this. He will have to try again somewhere else, if he wants to secure a legacy before its too late."
Tea party supporter Sarah Palin piled on the criticism. "This little skirmish in Libya, it's not that inspirational. But what would you expect from a Kenyan anyway, he was never going to have the backbone to go all out against his own people."
Meanwhile, in Tripoli, an increasingly desperate Colonel Ghadaffi is reported to have committed to reducing the number of ways his name can be spelled, if the west will stop bombing. Too late, Moe, too late.
Obama cartoon by Martin Siegel, see the full print here
Other Satire News
Obama to read from Waffle House menu
Swine Flu Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Atheist Sees Image of Big Bang in Slice of Toast
Texans against Jesus in Public Schools
So-called Hero Pilot Refuses to Lands Plane in Chicago River
Local Walmarts Fear Rise of Super-Walmart
or Click here for all our Satire News Stories
Thanks for visiting!