Iranian Rubber Duck Rampage
For immediate release:Did Rubber Ducks Target Naval Convoy?
(ACPA-OMAN) President Bush announced that a major International incident was narrowly avoided following a confrontation between a group of Iranian Rubber Ducks and several US Naval Destroyers in the Gulf.
The incident occurred in the Strait of Hormuz, a narrow gateway to the Arabian Gulf thorough which much of the world's oil is shipped. It follows just weeks after Iranian speedboats drove in circles near the same ships in an event described as a "dangerous and provocative incident".
Describing today's drama the President said that the navy "was preparing to launch an all-out attack when the wind changed and the angry ducks were blown in a different direction".
"This second incident is very disturbing" said the President adding "I am not fooled by the seeming innocence of these ducks, which I believe are weapons of mass destruction in disguise. We will launch pre-emptive strikes on Iran if these incidents keep happening."
However a spokesman for the Iranian Kindergarten Teachers Association said the rubber ducks were simply part of a game that some students played on a field trip to the beach. "They just accidentally floated away from our 5 year olds who are very distressed over the loss of their ducks". Bush rejected that explanation and demanded to know "Why did the Ducks cross the Gulf"?
Meanwhile the FBI are investigating if the Gulf Incident is connected to intelligence reports that a very threatening and dangerous Lame Duck has been seen in or around the White house and at Camp David on several occasions recently.